Talmud

"I just checked with Haimchinkel Malintz Anaynikal on a philosophical issue that has been bothering me. The question is two-pronged: “Should really rich people answer their own telephones and, if they are occupied when the call comes in, does an immediate return of the call by the millionaire show weakness or a dearth of committee meetings or a lack of attention to strategic planning?” Haimchinkel Malintz Anaynikal had Nookie do some research. The results are conclusive and irrefutable. There is nothing in the Bible, Koran or Talmud that prohibits or encourages the slow answering of a distant yodel or the melodious squawk of a ram’s horn (there were no telephones at the time those books were given or written). In addition, there are no governmental laws that Nookie could find (except for some new and old countries in Eastern Europe) that prohibit answering your own telephone or quickly returning a call."